I took a few weeks off from Christmas to New Year and it made me realize that rest can be productive and we deserve rest too. I read this book about upper limits by gay hendricks and there’s a section that says time is relative according to Einstein. He took time off and was more productive and focused than working overtime and pushing through. Last year, I took time off but struggled because I had an electrical fire in my building that caused no WiFi, no electricity, and no fridge for a whole month, right after Christmas.
It was hard for me to slow down and not think about business 24/7. Slowing down is an art and requires brain muscles. I noticed my brain couldn’t turn off at night sometimes because I was worrying about a million tasks to do the next day. I made a rule to not do anything clinical or therapy related and if I had to work, I would go to the coworking space or cafe.
Growing up raised in an Asian American household, I learned how to maximize productivity and efficiency but was not taught how to slow down rest, and restore energy. My father often gave me two choices during breaks: do math/Chinese or take a nap. I would always choose to take a nap. My mother would critique me “Why are you doing nothing? So lazy.” I internalize that productive is good and work is productive but it’s not true.
As I slowed down, my scarcity mindset kicked in and I thought about what my business coach said about how if I don’t keep working then referrals will stop coming consistently. I had to silence those thoughts and need to hustle.
Things I did to slow down this break:
1) I’m used to multitasking, but that can stress me out and make it easier to mess up. I allowed myself to do one thing at a time.
2) I stopped setting my alarm clock, and just allowed myself to sleep and wake up naturally.
3) I stopped going to the gym, and just went out for walks instead.
4) Choosing mental health over financial security, practicing an abundance mindset that my clients will come back and new potential referrals will come in, I can always make the money back.
5) Mindfulness, just being mindful of my breathing, eating, and being aware of what my body needs at that moment. I tried to drink water and eat when I wanted to.
6) Last few years I avoided email, taxes, and paperwork until Jan 1 and my work piled up so much that it stressed me out. This year, I picked a day and went to the cafe and worked on it for a little bit, breaking the tasks into chunks helped me. I also allowed myself not to blog or make reels on Instagram, although I had the time and energy, it was still work and I didn’t want to stress myself out.
7) Doing nothing, not having things scheduled or planned, just waking up and doing whatever I feel like doing and not having to do chores, a staycation mindset.
8) minimizing time and energy spent instead of maximizing time and energy spent, so instead of squeezing every minute to be productive, I would wear a simple outfit every day, or minimize my choices to keep it simple so I don’t require use too much energy to decide what to wear, what to eat. It’s like the menu of life with just three choices
If you enjoy this blog post, and want an Asian American therapist in NYC who can help you slow down and rest, please contact me to book a free 15-minute intro call with me
