No matter what age group you fall under, today’s dating world can be tough to navigate. Fun and exciting, yes. But also stressful, and sometimes, when things might not work out, a little hurtful.
In the early stages of dating someone new, everything is a new experience. Having some dating jitters is completely normal for this very reason. Hopefully, the jitters are exciting ones.
If you are someone who already struggles with anxiety issues, having these dating jitters can feel like a big deal. All your feelings are valid, so it is important to understand that negative anxiety can be unhealthy for a relationship and can be managed.
Listen To Your Jitters
Your feelings are valid, but why not put a positive spin on your jitters? Think of this feeling as a sign that you are excited about this opportunity and want everything to go well. You’re displaying more emotional intelligence by having these feelings toward a date!
Your anxiety and jitters are only temporary. This unpleasantness will not be here forever. Don’t let those feelings win and take over your outlook and mood. Talk yourself up and try to ease your mind with positive speech. Know this will all get easier as it goes.
Pick The Right Activity For Your Feelings
No one said early dates need to be super romantic or stressful. If you’re feeling overly anxious about a first date or even a second date, take some of the pressure off by choosing activities or locations that are more laid back. If you feel relaxed with the atmosphere, you’re more likely to let that guard down a bit and just enjoy your date. Plus, if you can dress down, it’s an added bonus on the relaxation front.
Prep Yourself And Your Mind
Self-care doesn’t need to be only a thing for afterward to unwind your night. Try engaging in some self-care activities before your dates to calm your mind and reduce some tension. A few hours before you need to get ready, go for a walk or do a yoga routine. Get some movement in to start reducing anxiety. Try meditating beforehand to clear your mind. Then while you get all dolled up for your date, throw on a chill playlist to keep yourself at ease. Or throw on dance jams to continue the movement train.
Look Good, Feel Good
So this has nothing to do with your specific partner and everything to do with you. If that person is going on a date with you, odds are they already find you attractive. They said yes to date. Therefore, they believe you are worth getting to know. But when you look good for yourself, you’re more than likely going to feel great. Wear that go-to outfit. Do your hair and makeup. Heck, put on those fancy shoes for a bang. Then take a moment to admire yourself before meeting up with your date.
Be Open And Honest
Anxiety is frequently triggered by fear—of the unknown, of things going wrong, and sometimes of things going right. Express this to your date. Depending on where you are with this new person, the level of sharing that you are at may differ. They may even be feeling the same type of anxiety on their end. Even if they aren’t, they will likely respect you for being honest and feel appreciated that they mean enough to be anxious over. Knowing they aren’t judging you can go a long way. And when the time is right, don’t be afraid to be vulnerable. The more open your communication is, the less room there is for that fear to creep in and trigger anxiety.
If your anxiety interferes with success in the dating world, have no fear! There are other ways to navigate this further. Contact me today for more discussion about how relationship counseling could help.
